5 Jokes a day 1/16/19

Old #TappanZeeBridge plunges into the Hudson in spectacular controlled #explosion... it's actually being used as catharsis for all of the traffic stress it has caused over the years.

#CERN just revealed plans for a new particle accelerator, and it's monstrously huge... you know particle physicists, obsessed with size.

#KarenPence to teach at school that bans LGBT students, teachers, and visitors... I guess #MikePence will have to see her on the weekends.

#KeyWest moves to ban sunscreens that could damage #reefs... just because the reefs have olive skin and tan, the rest of us have to get sun burns.

#Tinder is testing the ability to share #Spotify music clips in chat... looks like 2 Live Crew's Me So Horny will be getting a resurgence.

#Feds can’t force you to unlock your phone with finger or face... however, nothing will stop them from using the old bully move of... 'quit hitting yourself, quit hitting yourself'