#AnnaKendrick forgot she was in #Twilight... Stephenie Meyer responded... well I forgot you were in Up in the Pitch Perfect Woods 4.
#OcasioCortez and #LindseyGraham invite each other to museums... it didn't seem sincere though... back in the day, when you invited someone to a museum... you meant it.
#GreenDay sort of landed on #Mars
... chip etched with Green Day 1986 was sent... aw man, the martians will have to wait 8 years until Dookie... while the band 'finds' itself.
Border Patrol agent's gender-reveal explosion sparked #wildfire... please don't do anything to reveal the baby's name... we know his name is arson.
#Manafort met with #JulianAssange... completely unrelated to the hack... Manafort is just doing that 50 embassies in 50 days vacation thing.
Is it just me or do #MelaniaTrump #WhiteHouseChristmas decorations have a #handmaidstale feel to them... coincidence or cry for help?
A dog #KimJongUn gave to #SouthKorea as a peace gift has had 6 puppies... anchor puppies... 1,000 more peace gifts and we'll have ourselves a declaration of war!
#hallmarkchristmasmovies has an app... suffering from lack of D-list actors, puppies, PG-13 sex innuendo, and a #Christmas layered on so thick you'll shit a candy cane... then forget the app and just up your shrink appointments to 5x a week.
Cautuon!... #Bumble app and #BumblebeeMovie
are two very different things... I have a date with my Camaro on Saturday.
#AmySedaris to voice a totally new character in the new #LionKing... excuse me Hollywood... if you are going to regurgitate my entire childhood, you will do so exactly as I remembered and not change a thing.
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