5 Jokes a day 12/20/18

The first trailer for #MenInBlackInternational is here... can you actually remake a series whose last movie came out only 6 years ago. I mean #WillSmith only looks like 5 to 10 years older than #ChrisHemsworth... maybe they forgot to neuralize me.

 'Hot #Jafar' has people rooting for the villain in the new #Aladdin... you know the cartoon version of Jafar wasn't half bad, in a creepy uncle, tickle fight taken too far kind of way... he was very popular in the #panther community.

 #Boys can have #periods too, children to be taught in latest victory for transgender campaigners... I'm all for #LGBTQ rights, my question is more of a logistical one, where do you tell boys to put the tampon?

 #Uber's self-driving cars return to public roads after fatal crash... as a precaution, passengers have to sit in a baby car seat... but if they're good, they'll get a cookie at the end of the ride.

 #Netflix denies they had the ability to read #Facebook users' private messages... yeah right, I just happen to mention it would be nice to have all of the shitty Adam Sandler movies and jokes all in one place.

 #TacoBell is testing 3 new menu items... in huge promotional event... buy all 3 and get 50% off your next colonoscopy.

 #ChuckSchumer and #OrrinHatch introduce federal sports gambling bill... 10 to 1 it passes... who wants in on this action.

 #MontereyBayAquarium apologizes for ‘fat-shaming’ otter, calling her '#thicc' on Twitter... sources say the Otter has been hitting the sushi bar a little hard.

 That Texas #Judge only ruled against #Obamacare to troll liberals... what's 20 million peoples' healthcare and well being as long as you can get your trolling in.